I let my friend use my caravan home for free three times – I’m annoyed she only gave me a ‘nice’ thank you gift once and then a ‘budget wine’
- The woman took to UK forum Mumsnet to ask others what they thought
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A woman revealed how she’s cross with her friend for thanking her with ‘budget’ wine after she let her use her caravan home for free.
The anonymous woman expressed her feelings on UK forum Mumsnet, where she said her and her partner lent out the static caravan for free, which would otherwise cost ‘£600 to £800’ and can sleep up to six people.
However, she explained that one friend had used the holiday home three times for free – and only gifted a ‘nice’ thank you gift once, before then offering ‘budget wine’ in replacement of a fee.
But several Mumsnet users thought the woman was being unreasonable as not every good deed should be transactional.
However, others leapt to the support of the poster and said that it was rude the group did not leave her anything on every occasion.
The anonymous woman expressed her feelings on UK forum Mumsnet , where she said her and her partner lent out the static caravan for free, which would otherwise cost ‘£600 to £800’ and can sleep up to six people (stock photo)
The woman wrote in her post: ‘We do let friends use it for free if we are definitely not going, e.g. if we know we have a weekend at home, then we’d let them use it then.
‘Lots of people have done this and mostly it is fine – we’ve been bought a whole range of thank you gifts from posh hampers to a box of milk tray, depending on the means of whoever borrows it and that’s all fine.
‘I don’t want people borrowing it because they don’t have much money to then spend money they don’t have on expensive gifts. And the only cost to us is wear and tear, and utilities (we have started asking for a tenner a night to cover utilities).’
The woman then said that her friend borrowed the caravan three times with two of her friends who have ‘no dependents.’
The first time the group stayed, they left a woman a ‘nice bottle’ of wine, to which she said thank you. She continued by saying: ‘The second time they left us nothing. We said nothing. The third time they left us a bottle of wine from the basics range of a supermarket.
‘Am I being unreasonable to be a bit cross at the leaving nothing time and the budget wine?,’ asked the woman.
‘Obviously I can just not lend them it again but I just feel a bit taken for granted. I mean I don’t need gifts as such, I just feel it’s a bit taking the mickey.
‘Like turning up for dinner at someone’s house without flowers or a bottle of wine. But maybe I have been spoiled by the people who send hampers.’
However, she explained in her post (pictured) that one friend had used the holiday home three times for free – and only gifted a ‘nice’ thank you gift once, before then offering ‘budget wine’ in replacement of a fee
The woman then finished the post by saying that she is borrowing a friend’s house and she was going to get them a case of wine as a thank you, because an AirBnB for the same amount of time would cost them more than £1,500.
But Mumsnet users thought the woman was being unreasonable as not every good deed should be transactional.
One user wrote: ‘I do think you’re being unreasonable. You aren’t gifting them a free holiday or saving them £600.
‘They most likely wouldn’t go there if you didn’t have a caravan that you have offered out or made clear it can be asked to be used by friends. You can’t say you don’t expect anything when you clearly do.’
Another wrote: ‘Oh these threads frustrate me, as do people who say they don’t expect anything as they are soooo kind allowing friends to use something they are not (rather than it sit empty) but then have certain (hidden) expectations of gratitude.
‘Either do it for free or don’t. Why a box of chocolates is OK and wine isn’t is bizarre.’
A third penned: ‘I don’t understand why you would let them have the caravan for free knowing that they could afford to pay
Some users thought the anonymous woman was being unreasonable for expecting gifts back for her good deed
‘If you want paying ask, don’t just expect a gift that you don’t need or want, then start moaning about it when you get nothing.’
A fourth commented: ‘Does it always have to be a transactional gift? Why can’ they just do something nice for you as you did for them? The way I was raised, we do things for each other to express gratitude.’
A fifth then said: ‘I don’t give to receive and a £10 bottle of wine is neither here nor there in the grand scheme of things. As long as they leave the place in the same condition as they found it, I would be just as happy with a thank you text message.’
But some people leapt to the support of the woman and said that it was rude the group did not leave her anything on every occasion.
But other Mumsnet users said they agreed with the poster and thought it was rude the group did not leave nice thank you gifts on each occasion
One user wrote: ‘It is incredibly rude and well she knows it! We were loaned a flat in London for three days and we left a large homemade hamper of treats from our local area and a bottle of vintage champagne!’
Another commented: ‘I agree with you, they should buy or do something to say thank you. I go on a trip every year to a wonderful place in a wonderful location that belongs to my friend’s in laws.
‘These people are doing a favour for my friend, not me, but I still send them a thank you gift of some sort each time.’
A third penned: ‘Of course they should offer a thank you gift, and frankly anyone who cannot see this has no social graces!’
A fourth said: ‘I think they are taking advantage here! You are kind enough to let them have the free use of your caravan. They in turn can’t be a**ed to leave anything nice?’
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