DEAR DEIDRE: ACCORDING to my mother-in-law I have put my career ahead of my children and as a result, they are rude and lacking in discipline.
She thinks I should have stayed at home like her and focused on my children.
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My aunt told me what my mum-in-law had said at a recent family christening and now I’m fizzing.
I am 41, married and have two sons and a daughter.
They are 10, eight and five. My mum-in-law is 77.
My children are definitely very lively but they are not rude or undisciplined.
I love my job as a palliative nurse but I’d never put it before my children.
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And I’m not sure how we would cover our bills without the second salary.
Should I have it out with her or keep schtum for the sake of peace?
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DEIDRE SAYS: It is always hurtful when someone close is critical.
Talk to your husband and see what he thinks.
Could her words have been exaggerated or misunderstood – were they reported accurately?
Perhaps he or you could have a chat with her when you feel calmer.
Explain that you understand she made different choices and found her criticism hurtful.
And remind her you are doing your absolute best.
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It would be best to clear the air to prevent a similar situation in the future.
I’m sending you my support pack Standing Up For Yourself, which will help you with this difficult conversation.
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