Seeing my husband dressed as a woman is a turn-off

DEAR DEIDRE: I WAS shocked to discover my husband has an alter ego called Natasha and has been dressing up in my clothes when I go out.

We have been married for eight years and I always knew he had a kinky side.

A few months ago I found out he liked wearing Lycra tights and heels. He said they made him feel sexy.

I supported him and even helped him buy some stilettos. When I asked if it meant he liked dressing as a woman, he denied it.

But now he has told me it’s gone a lot further than he admitted.

He has been wearing my dresses and underwear when I’m out, has bought a long blonde wig and make-up and even made a profile on a website. I am 40 and he is 42.

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He says he doesn’t want to be a woman, or even go out in public like one, it’s just a fetish.

I feel so confused and that I’m not good enough for him. I’m not a prude, but I’m a normal woman who likes straight sex.

Seeing him dressed as a woman is a turn-off. What can I do?

DEIDRE SAYS: Dressing as a woman is more common than you might think.

For some men, it’s a way of relieving stress or just a bit of fun. For others, as it sounds for your husband, it has a sexual element – it’s a kink.

Please don’t feel that it has any reflection on you or his feelings for you.

You have been supportive, certainly haven’t banned him, and that’s probably all he expects.

Most cross-dressers are very happy in their heterosexual relationships. It’s the dressing up that fulfils their needs.

Talk to him and ask for reassurance. My support pack, Cross Dressing, explains more.

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