Some romantic people think that everyone has a soul mate out there, meant to complete us in a way that fills our hearts with love and our lives with companionship. However, there are also people who believe that humans aren’t meant to settle down with just one person for the rest of their lives, and are, instead, naturally inclined to either live on their own and/or have multiple partners. Whoopi Goldberg happens to be in the latter group of people, which is why she doesn’t believe in monogamy.
Granted, The View co-host has been married three times, but those relationships didn’t exactly result in lasting, wedded bliss. “Her first marriage to Alvin Martin ended in divorce in 1979,” according to The Oprah Magazine. She then “married cinematographer David Claessen in 1986, and the couple divorced two years later.” The last time she tied the knot was in October 1994 when she said “I do” to actor Lyle Trachtenberg, but the two called it quits the following year. Marriage aside, the star has also dated other men in the entertainment industry, including actors Ted Danson and Frank Langella.
However, these days, Goldberg feels like living alone is the best option for her for a few good reasons.
Non-monogamy? Whoopi Goldberg says 'go for it'
According to Whoopi Goldberg, she’s simply not cut out for monogamous relationships. “They expect you to get married. So I kept trying to do that, but I didn’t want to share information with somebody else,” she told The New York Times in 2019. “I didn’t want anybody asking me why I was doing what I was doing, or to have to make the other person feel better. But if you’re in a relationship, you have to do those things, and it took me a while to figure out that I didn’t want to.”
“Then one day I thought: I don’t have to do this. I don’t have to conform,” she continued. “I tried marriage, and it wasn’t for me. You can’t be in a marriage because everybody’s expecting you to.”
In 2011, Goldberg echoed the sentiment during an appearance on Piers Morgan Tonight (via BET), saying, “I suppose that, you know, you have to actually be in love with the person that you marry. You have to really be committed to them. And I’m just — I don’t have that commitment.”
Beyond that, the New York Post points out that in her book If Someone Says “You Complete Me,” Run!: Whoopi’s Big Book of Relationships, Goldberg addressed monogamy (or rather, non-monogamy), explaining, “Sometimes in a relationship, people can’t always get what they need, and if you have reputable people you can turn to in order to get what you need, I say go for it. It is a whole lot better than being frustrated and angry at the person you love.” That’s certainly one way to look at it.
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